Going to pick out a cat today.

I have to be there at noon today. The lady has four black cats. Two males, two females.
We’ve already got a name picked out for a female. Kira-Lin
We have to get a female because older male cats tend to be very hostile toward younger males cats. Some have been known to kill young males from a new litter. Mean old cats.

I have so many things swirling around in my head and my heart.
I just finished God’s Blogs. I’m letting Heather read it next, but I’m really going to miss this book. I can see myself reading it a few times a year. Just like Velvet Elvis.
Great… now I’m going to be reading all the time like some… person who reads a lot.

Christmas gift ideas for me… hmm.
Peas on Earth. ( I’m not a big fan of peas, but corn on Earth isn’t funny.
God’s will toward all men… and women too!

I think there’s a line between music ministry and musical performance. Unfortunately, the line isn’t as “fine” as we’d like it to be where we can accidentally slip over it.
I just noticed it when I was playing my guitar. I started out playing it and just enjoying the music and private time with God, but then my mind drifted to thinking about people hearing the song and what my voice sounded like and whether or not people would like the sound of my voice. Bam!!! I’m right in the middle of musical performing. See? The line isn't as fine as we think. I pushed myself right over it by thinking of myself. God is supposed to be the focus of the music... not me.

I need to inject something here. These are my thoughts and feelings. I’m not holding anything back. Some may trivialize them, but for me, this is a treatise of my very soul.
So please don’t take this lightly. I know I may talk a lot about very little some times, but when I’m serious, I’m serious. Right now, as I am every time it comes to my relationship with God, I’m serious.
I question myself constantly when it comes to my right-standing in the eyes of God. Am I falling away or am I moving closer?
I do this with my children and my wife as well. I want to make sure my family is happy with me as a father/husband/friend. Not so they can be pleased with me, but so that they are happy… period. I do not want to be the source of anyone’s pain or suffering. This is not a desperate desire to please, but instead, it is a calculated desire to nurture and strengthen.

God wrote me a letter last night. It was in a book I was reading. I think I’d like to share it with my friends and family at New Faith. Thankfully, Pastor Chuck has asked me to share my heart this coming Sunday. I thank God every day for that man. He works so hard and receives nothing in return. I’m always concerned about the pressures being put on him. I know for a fact that I’m the source of some of that pressure, so I try to not be a burden to him. Instead I try to be an asset to the ministry God has called him to shepherd.

Yes, I know he’s probably reading this… I’m not trying to suck up. I’m just typing whatever is in my heart at a given moment.

If you happen to find yourself in prayer,

hey, it could happen…

Pray for pastors Chuck and JaNonda. They do more for us than we know. I’ll probably get an earful for this, but they’re got a lot more on their plate than usual and, for the life of me, I can’t step far enough back to see the “big picture”. I know that God is using the situations in their lives to nurture and teach, but I can’t see the lesson here. I guess that’s what I get for not being God. Whew!! Good thing too. All I know is that they’re hurting and I can’t seem to help.

This kinda sucks.